This is a really depressing quote if you happen to find yourself, as I do, without good health. And this guy Herophilus doesn't give much hope. So many thoughts running around in my head but none of them leading anywhere I'd like to go. Get outta your head is what I keep hearing......to which I reply.......where am I going to go? This past week has been one of the roughest in a long time. Going round and round the same issues in my head, mostly stemming from the frustrations that have been sucking my energy for over two years. It's brutal to keep going round and round, especially when you can't walk.
So I've taken almost a week of near complete solitude to consider my life. Kinda scary when coming from such a dark place. What I do have going for me are an amazing family and very dear friends who respect me and my process more so than even I do.
What I'm trying to do or accomplish or discover is my new "normal", especially when I don't "want" a new normal. I want, I want, I want my "old" really fun life back. There we have it ...... the issue right now is that I'm stuck in temper tantrum mode instead of stepping back and allowing the universe to reveal my new normal.
Yes, it's difficult living in constant pain, no, I don't have my health, and the fights for my medical care are going to continue for quite some time which is really depressing. I've played that record over and over and over and gotten nowhere but into a deep dark hole. Perhaps it's time for a different strategy. Hire a yogi, learn to meditate, take up drinking to excess, or as a bumper sticker from years ago said, "Get in, hang on and shut up!!!"
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