And the Beat Goes On ........

It's been forever!!!  As boring as my life is this has been a very full month; depositions, mediation, cortisone shots in both the IT bands and my right hip, plus my computer took a sabbatical.  So here I am......writing on my brand new wonderful beast, well once I learn Windows 8.

The thing I really miss, meditating on whatever message the universe gives me, a seemingly random quote.  What's been interesting is that I couldn't write with my ancient computer, and as such I didn't find many quotes to ponder.  What's that all about.  Is this truly my sanity forum? 

Regardless, one thing that remains the same is my incessant need to be in control, leaving no room for "what is", those little surprises that make life interesting, new things, people, experiences.  I miss the fun of the unexpected.

Can't help but wonder......does my incessant thinking and worrying feed the depression that seems to overtake me?  What I learned this week is that when everything seems black, look for one point of light in the dark sky, make that the north star and focus on it.  Go to whatever bright spot there is, and it changes continually, it may be my family, a friend, perhaps my pups.......  Many days lately this has seemed a monumental task so I've turned to comedy movies.  Whatever works, the goal is to laugh, smile and find the ray of sunshine.  Stop thinking and start searching.